Girl, I am so proud of you! When I look at you from a completely objective, emotionally detached perspective, I can see the totally new person you are from 2 years ago. I don’t get caught up in the roller coaster ride you seem to be on with the fluctuations in your weight. I don’t get caught up in the despair of the stuckedness you seem to think you are in. I don’t see how far you have left to go. Instead I see a woman who could barely make it to the gym and when you did you simply walked for 45 minutes and went home. Or you swam for 45 minutes and went home. You struggled to get there many days this time one year ago. And what did you do? You cried out for help. You chose to let someone else into your struggle and you asked Coach to go to the gym with you and to call you whenever he was going. Girl, that took some guts! You knew what kind of guy Coach was/is!
I see your courage. The courage to take that step and invite Coach into this with you. And before that the courage you had to let Aaron know you were trying once again. THen later to invite Adam to the gym with you!
I see your perseverance. Even though you feel like you have failed so many times over and that you are at risk of failing now, you keep getting up. In the past, months would go by before you got back up again. But not now. THis time you get up after a fall within days.
You have done so much this past year. You have started running. You have participated in triathlons. You started biking. You have shared your story so boldly. You have not given up even when it was hard! You have lost 63 some odd pounds. Your 9-year-old nephew weighs 75! You have tried new things, taken great risks, learned to trust others, and learned to confront your story and the hold it has on you. You have not held back.
Despite feeling like you are stuck, because I know you do, take a minute and look at where you have come from. Learn from your past struggles and keep doing something different. Just because you have found a new happiness doing all of these fun athletic things, don’t get comfortable here. You still have work to do, and you have all the tools and resources you need to make it happen. Enjoy them, but don’t stop working on your goals!
I know you will figure it out. You will figure out the balance that will be necessary to ensure that this weight loss comes about in a wholly healthy manner. You will figure out how to balance time, and energy. You will figure out what needs to be given up to ensure a win. You will do this thang, because you can’t give up. You cannot quit. A quitter no longer lives inside of you.
So keep going Kim. You have a BIG life to live. Your story is not complete yet. I know you will succeed, even if it takes longer than you would like, because I know the One who lives in you. The One who designed you with all of that courage and perseverance within. The One who is using your story.
You have got this thing…No one can stop you…but You.
One more thing. Remember Thomas Edison and how many times he failed in his attempts to create the light bulb…before he finally got it right. He didn’t give up on his vision, and neither should you.