The Face Of Happiness

Yesterday, I had an interview in my beloved GR, for a job I really want.

Today, I met with my old counselor to talk about all of the forgiveness stuff that has been cropping up for me this past week or so.  I thought seeing her, showing her where I am at weight wise and hashing out this stuff would be helpful.

Then I drove back to the “D”.

Typically when I leave GR, there is a sadness that hangs about me. I love that city.  It is the place I consider my home.  And I procrastinate leaving to the last possible moment and count the days and minutes until I get to go back again.

Today, that was not the case. Today, I met with Esther and left immediately after.

As I was driving I realized I had the biggest, cheesiest, perma-grin plastered on my face and that there was a feeling within me that screamed happiness!  By the time I got home, my cheeks hurt.  It was ridiculous! 

So happy I don't even mind the double chin!

So happy I don't even mind the double chin!

It was wonderful!

Here is my assessment of the source of such joy.

1.  I had a wonderful time in GR with friends.

2.  I have hopes of moving back there soon.

3.  I had a fantastic interview.

4.  My counselor confirmed that the things that I have been thinking about this week in regards to forgiveness and my abuser and how I have been relating to it, was actually pretty right on and healthy…which in essence deemed me “not crazy”!  🙂

5.  In general, I have been feeling like I have been making good choices lately.  Healthy choices. Last week, with all the Gibran stuff swirling in my head, conversations with friends stirring more stuff up, and all the rest, there were a couple times I found myself starting to eat mindlessly.  I would catch myself within just a couple of bites and stop, knowing that it was mindless eating.  Something to do with my hands while my head swirled with all these thoughts.  It was good to see the self control.  It was good to see that what once was a stronghold is no more.  It was good to see myself keeping good healthy perspective on what was going on, without being consumed by it and succumbing to despair, all the while staying very connected to the emotion of it all.

6.  At least 6 people said something to me about my weight loss and how it is becoming more obvious!  Very fun!  And very cool to notice that men are noticing, commenting, and I am not freaking out!  I am also starting to catch myself deflecting those compliments and interrupt myself to say “Thank You!”

I think all of these reasons were part of the perma-grin…that apparently spreads by text message.  Then Coach called tonight, and he could hear it in my voice…and he had no idea…. 🙂

THEN….THEN folks, I went to my weigh in!

I lost 5.7 Pounds!  I thought I had a perma-grin before.

Imagine a woman, sitting in an auto repair shop texting her people in excitement…with a silly grin plastered on her face….sometimes a chuckle slipping out…but always the grin.

Even finding out that they don’t know what is wrong with my car could not wipe the grin off my face.

On to the dealership…for more assessments of my vehicle…perma-grin right there with me!

Oh by the way…5.7 pounds officially puts me in the 200’s!!!  Woot!  Woot!!!

Ceeelebration time…Come ON!  I feel like dancing tonight!!!

Hey Aaron, I trust you!  I will never doubt you again!  I swear!  All of blogland is my witness! 😀

One other side note…but not really a side note. I lost 5.7 lbs this week, during a week when I was looking at some pretty significant issues, emotions and thoughts swirling around like crazy.  This is significant.  It means I have a handle on my emotional eating patterns.  Such sweet victory, to lose so significantly while facing hard things.   God is sooo good!

On the road…

“But my heart is set on a pilgrimage
to heaven’s own bright King
So in faltering or victory
I will always sing”- Charlie Hall


24 thoughts on “The Face Of Happiness

  1. Excellent post. Congrats on the loss AND on the self control issues. You are awesome!!

    And good luck with the car issues. 🙂

  2. You have plenty to grin about! Well done on an awesome loss! I am so pleased for you that you are moving forward in so many areas in your life. And to be in the 200’s – that’s just great!

  3. Way to go on the weight loss. I love it when I get one of those stupid looking perma-grins. Everyone wants to know what I’ve been up to!

  4. I am so happy for you Kim!!! You go girl!!! 🙂

    I am not only dancing with you…I am doing the “disco”. OOPS…that tells my age doesn’t it. Oh well, I am still doing the disco!!! 🙂

    Thanks for letting me know that my comment thingy is working again. I don’t know what I did to it but I am leaving all my settings alone, I wouldn’t be able to fix it again, lol.

  5. WAY TO GO KIM!!!

    I am praying for the job for you….I know how much you would love to get back to GR


  6. Kim it is sickly official that we truly are twins because my original comment was going to be:

    Warning: The cell phone photography was done by professionals. Please do not try this at home.

    Sick! Sick, I tell you!

    It is apparent to me, now more than ever, the reason we didn’t meet in GR 9 years ago. Your statement that we would have been each other’s enablers is very true, but moreover, I would not have appreciated your amazing spirit and sense of humor.

    The internet is wonderfully weird. And you are fabulous! Great job on the 5.7!

    • HA…that is soooo not a cell phone photo…my cell takes horrible photos….but alas I hear you! Twins and it is Sick! Nor I yours lady…probably would have been full of all sorts of judgments back then 🙂

  7. I agree you have so much to smile about and I just love that picture. You can tell how happy, content and great spirited you are. You really have worked hard and I mean really hard to be were you are at today and I am so proud of you for doing and accomplishing all that you have. I am sure you will even do better next weigh in 🙂
    By the way I was just trying to get you motivated to run even harder if you want to keep a lower weight than me 🙂

    • it worked Rob…ran/walked 3.59 miles tonight….of course I went that far cuz I got lost….but that is beside the point!

  8. Friendly competition is excellent! Over 3 miles, girl, you will be running the mini with me next year and loving it!

    • run/walking 3+ miles is not the same as running a mini! You are crazy to think Iwill be runnign 13.1 miles…I think not….however, I do plan on swimming/running in a tri in September. Wanna bike it for me as part of a relay team? It is a all girl tri, and I need a biker still for that one!

    • might be 14 or so….I don’t know…last year Aaron biked it….I was too focused on not dying in the water to really take note of how FAR he was riding! It is Labor Day weekend. Last year we then did this camping trip. I am debating on whether I wanna do that again this year. If so, I wanna get a LOT of people to come for THAT! Just looked it up…20K bike ride…whatever that translates to.

  9. That’s just over 9 miles. That’s my holiday to work, is it actually ON Labor Day? If not, I can try to fanagle out of it. I’d love to be your wing woman!

  10. Of flipping course I am scheduled to work that weekend. But if I request it off now, I may luck out. I will talk to my Clinical Mgr tonight. If she okays it, I’m in! (Did I just say that outloud?)

  11. Pingback: Who Are You? « The Road to Beautiful

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