Just A Fat Day!

First off let me just say….I am not despairing…

However, I feel fat today.  I know…I know…how silly of me to feel so…when it is true. 🙂

However I am thinking on some level I am syking myself up for tomorrow’s weigh in.  I am somewhat nervous about it. Last weeks weigh in was a gain, despite doing everything right.  This week I walked 36 miles in 3 days due to my job and stayed within calories all week as well.  I should be able to expect a loss, maybe even a significant one.  However, I am noticing all of this walking is causing water retention.  I notice my feet are swollen by end of day as are my hands.

My wrists and hands have become my favorite part of my body.  I have long fingers and despite my size I actually have little wrists….I like to look at them as it gives me some indication of where I will be someday, soon. But this past week and particularly today they have looked fat to me and I am certain it is the water retention.

So with all that said, I am nervous about tomorrow mornings weigh in. I would love to lose 5-6 lbs, but know that is not realistic.  I would be really happy with 3 and ok with 1 or 2.  I will however be incredibly disappointed if I held steady or even gained.

On another note, I saw a video taken of me this weekend.  It was only on for a second.  But my first thought after seeing it was…oh my goodness…where did I go?  When I look in the mirror I do not see a lot of physical differences, but if I look at certain pictures or in this case, a video…I am shocked at what I see, or rather what I DON”T see. 🙂

So I thought I would remind myself of some non-weight related successes as I gear up for tomorrow.

  • I can climb a flight of stairs and still breathe
  • I can walk up a hill and carry on a conversation
  • I can run
  • I walked freakin 36 miles in 3 days!!!
  • I am 3 sizes smaller
  • I have lost 51 LBS and should be and am proud of that!

Those are just a few of the things I can do now and have done already.  I look forward to adding to the list!

ON a side note, while talking with my 4 year old nephew, Garrett, he says this to me.

Garrrett: “Auntie, are you married?”

Me: “No Garrett, I am not.”

Garrett: “You need to get married with flowers, I will give you a flower!”

Later, while talking with the almost 9 year old nephew, Gavin, he was also talking about me and marriage.

Gavin: “You know Auntie, I have taken you out of time out, you are allowed to get married now.” (He used to tell me I am not allowed to get married because he didn’t want to share me!”

Me: “I know Gavin, but I kind of have to find a guy first.”

Gavin: ” Well you know Auntie, boys kind of like it when you smile at them a lot, and kind of hang around them, and look at them, and laugh at all their jokes.  Oh and you have to touch them too.  Boys like that.  If you do that, you will get married because a boy will know you like them…”

Well, there ya have it folks…that is a 8 yr old boys perspective on dating/relationships/marriage!

I am curious though, men who read my blog…how far off base is he, if at all?

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