I am down 8 lbs! While I do see this as a victory, there is still some disappointment in that it is not a new 8 lbs lost. Actually only 2 of it is new. But I am on my way. And hopefully, I won’t turn back again. I have been silent on this matter for some time now. OK, so I started the blog to write about the up and down struggle I have with losing weight and I have only written the ups 🙂 Hmmm I hope to get better about that.
I was asked by a dear friend last night how he can proactively support me in this journey. I had no answer for him. I know that I know that I have his support without judgment or condemnation. In fact I have many people in my life that I have that with. I truly am blessed in that way! My problem is, when I am struggling, I don’t see that. I hear loud and clear my own voice in my head that screams of my failures and insecurities. So I plod along in my own way and because I am very VERY good at putting on a good face…no one knows I struggle. Then I wonder why no one notices.
I do know that I am not up for every person in my life asking me daily how I am doing and where I am at with this struggle or any other. I tried that. It doesn’t work. It just highlights my failings that much more. Besides that, if you only knew how many amazing supportive people I have in my life…you would know how overwhelming that would get.
I am up for giving a few key people in my life free reign to ask anything, anytime, but please don’t ask me publicly (as if I need to say that to those key people). You know if you are a key person. IF you are wondering if you are a key person…I am sorry…but you probably are not. Anonymous friend mentioned above…come out of your head a minute…you are one of them 🙂
Some people may get their feelings hurt by this, but as much as I am up for honesty and relationship and authenticity…I have to go with what I need in this. I have to think about me. Imagine that…what a concept 🙂
So I will see you on the downside…and if I think of more proactive ways you can support me…well I will let you know!